Life is no longer private. An often-said phrase these days, ”It didn’t happen if it isn’t on Facebook” may be a check that many of us do not want to cash when it comes to divorcing. Posting on social media during a divorce can have serious consequences. Not only can it impact your case, but your children, friends, and possibly the wider public will be privy to the information you post, the emotions and outbursts that have become so visible with the advent of social media. I’ve created a list of reasons why it's generally advisable to avoid posting about your divorce on social media:
Privacy Breach: Divorce is a personal matter, and sharing details on social media can expose sensitive information to a wide audience, including friends, family, and potentially even strangers.
Emotional Impulsivity: Divorce can be emotionally charged, leading to impulsive posts that you may (most likely will) regret later when emotions have cooled down.
Legal Consequences: Anything posted on social media can be used as evidence in court. Negative or incriminating posts could potentially harm your case, affecting child custody, alimony, or property division. Likewise, deleting your posts while in a pending divorce can lead to court sanctions for destroying evidence. Be smart and don’t create the evidence to begin with.
Escalation of Conflict: Posting about your ex-spouse can escalate conflicts and lead to further disputes, making it more challenging to reach an amicable resolution. Amicable resolutions keep costs down, your monies that you saved for your kids college funds don’t have to be used on lawyers to get through a divorce.
Impact on Children: I cannot stress this enough - Children of divorce may be negatively affected by public social media posts, feeling embarrassed, hurt, or confused by what they see online. Children are the product of two parents. When one negatively speaks about the other to the children, the children are directly affected. The children are, after all, a product of both parents. Build your spouse or ex- spouse up in the eyes of the children. If both parents take this route, their lives will be much easier.
Misinterpretation: People can easily misinterpret posts, leading to unnecessary misunderstandings and complications, especially when emotions are involved.
Future Repercussions: Once something is posted online, it can be challenging to remove it completely. Your posts may come back to haunt you in the future when you've moved on from the divorce.
Damage to Reputation: Sharing personal details and grievances publicly can harm your reputation, affecting your personal and professional life.
Friendship Strain: Mutual friends may feel pressured to take sides, leading to strained relationships and further complications.
Negative Emotional Impact: Constantly checking your ex's social media can also be emotionally distressing, hindering the healing process. Sometimes, you just have to move on and not let your ex’s life control yours.
Loss of Control: Sharing on social media can lead to a loss of control over your narrative, as people may form opinions based on selective information.
Lack of Resolution: Engaging in arguments on social media rarely leads to resolution and can prolong the divorce process.
In summary, posting on social media during a divorce is generally not advisable due to its potential to jeopardize privacy, exacerbate conflicts, and have lasting legal and emotional consequences. It's often wiser to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist in private settings rather than venting or sharing details online. Be careful, what you say in the world can and most likely will be used against you in the future.